free spirit. 

 
My spirit was set free.

She could no longer handle the lock and key.

She drifted with the wind,

and smiled a smile that had never been seen before.

She went far, far away

to lands unheard of

and thought thoughts that could never be.

She returned with a sparkle in her eye,

and with more wonder than before.

For the best thing for her,

is to be free once more.

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The moon & the sun. 

  
Do you wonder why the moon fell in love with the sun? 

So do I. 

Could it be her beauty? 

Perhaps her warmth?

Possibly the science behind her.

Or maybe, just maybe…the sun gave the moon something to exist for. 

Remember, where there is light, there must be darkness. 

Now isn’t that beautiful? 

The love affair

It’s a never ending love story; 
The love affair between lonely nights and my mind. 

The love affair between imagination and reality. 

The love affair between dreaming and hoping. 

 I want it to go away, but I secretly want it here to stay. 

So, here’s to another one of “those” nights, where I’ve never felt so in love.  

You should let you love you.

I bet the title lured you in, if that’s the case, i’m glad it did and when you’ve finished reading, you’ll be glad as well.  (I hope)


You should let you love you.

A rant about letting you love you.

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” -Dr. Seuss


It’s true, there is no one alive who is “youer” than you.  How does that make you feel?  It should make you feel exceptional about yourself, but unfortunately we live in a world where it seems as if being yourself will never be good enough for you, or anybody you associate yourself with.  The ridiculous standards that are set by society are so unrealistic and quite frankly, it’s a shame that we think we have to be more like someone else in order to be successful, or in order to love yourself.  Please, give yourself some credit, you’re still alive and you have accomplished whatever it is that you have accomplished thus far, whether it be graduating university, or losing 10 pounds.  Nobody did that for you, YOU did that for YOURSELF and you deserve a pat on the back, actually, better yet, you deserve to be loved by someone great…like YOURSELF. Sure, everybody makes mistakes, but it’s up to you to get back up from your fall, and how gracefully you do it. If you haven’t failed at least once in your life, or made a stupid mistake you must not be human.  It’s in our human nature to mess up, make stupid decisions and have a few regrets.  Think about it this way, if you hadn’t made those mistakes or made that stupid decision you wouldn’t be the person you are today, and today…you’re pretty great, scars and all.  We’re meant to go through tough times in order to flourish as humans.  If this were a perfect world, we would all be perfect, but this is not a perfect world, and there is no such thing as a perfect person and that is a good thing; imagine how boring life would be if everything was perfect.  Not many things start off beautiful, but many things end beautifully. Don’t do it for anybody but yourself, but I need you to fall in love with yourself if you haven’t already.  It took me a while before I allowed myself to fall in love with myself, but when it happened it made me so much happier.  I realized my worth, and all my accomplishments.  I took the blame for all my mistakes and I embraced them because i needed to in order to overcome the disappointment I had with my self.  It’s okay to be disappointed with yourself, but never let it consume you because it will be that much harder to get over it.  Never let anything negative consume you.  Be consumed by good things, and positive vibes, it’s one of the best things you can do for yourself.  Everybody has their days where they hate the world, -I have those at least once a week- but that ugly feeling is only temporary, you must not let it drag on. Never let anybody ever tell you that you are not good enough, you ARE good enough as long as you believe you are.  Never let anybody ever cause you to fall out of love with yourself.  Also, it’s okay to be a little selfish sometimes.

Stay awesome, release good vibes, always believe in yourself, be your own inspiration and fall head over heels for yourself.  You ARE good enough.  You ARE capable of doing whatever it is you want to do.  You ARE beautiful.  You ARE awesome.

Give yourself some credit, you’ve made it this far and you’re not that bad 🙂

xoxo, Tori.

the two-block journey. (a short story)

The Two-Block Journey

A short story.

By: Victoria Quintanilla

I want you to think about the happiest times in your life. The moments that cause you to smile each and every time you think about them, the moments you hope never to forget even when your mind grows old and tired, the moments you will tell your children and their children, the moments that have molded you into the best version of yourself; the moments that gave you a reason to live, in hopes for more of those moments.   This is a story about happiness, in its purest form: the innocence of a young girl, accompanied by the wisdom of her grandfather.

“Grandpa, I wanna go to the park.”

“Okay, let me put my sandals on.”

The smile that spread across the face of the very active, cute, persistent, 5-year-old Grace could’ve been seen from a mile away. While impatiently waiting for her Grandpa to put on his dark brown Velcro sandals, which already had the imprint of his feet, Grace started to look through some drawers in the dining room.

“Ready?” her Grandpa asked.

She looked up at him with a toothless grin and said, “Yup!”

“Okay! Let’s go.”

Hand in hand, they headed out the door of her grandpas blue-grey wooden house and their two-block journey to the park began. The admiration Grace had for her grandpa was not a secret; for these two shared a special bond. Not long after their departure, she looked up at him with her big brown eyes, and the conversation between a 64-year-old white-haired man, and a 5-year-old brown-haired girl began. You see, Grace was a very curious child; she wanted to know who, what, when, where and why at all times, and when her questions were answered, she would remain silent for about three seconds until she thought up another question to ask. There wasn’t much you could get past her inquisitive nature. Her Grandpa was very much used to it, and it seemed as if he enjoyed it just as much as she did.

“Grandpa, when were you born?”

“ March of 1933.”

Cars zoomed past them and dogs barked as they approached their usual route between a guardrail and the red poorly painted fence that held back three dogs. Trips to the park were an often occurrence for this pair, Grace spent as much time as she could with her grandpa, she found a best friend in him, and he in her.

“Grandpa, why is there so many different colors on this?” she asked as she pointed to the guardrail riddled with different colored paint which separated them from the not-so-busy street.

“That happens when cars accidentally bump into the guardrail.”

“Oh! Now I know!” she replied with a sweet innocent smile.

Grace loved learning new things, and her Grandpa loved teaching her all that he could. To her, he was the smartest man in the world; Grace didn’t know that his education had only reached up to the sixth grade, and even if she did know, her thoughts would’ve remained the same.

At last, the pair reached the park and Grace ran into to the rock filled area that was the home to many different slides, countless vulgarities in the form of graffiti, and her imagination. While Grace ran around wild, her Grandpa sat patiently and quietly in his usual spot, there he could keep an eye on her, even if she tried hiding. His eyes only wandered to the occasional passing car, other than that his attention was fixated on his granddaughter who captured his heart entirely and gave him a new zest for life. The smile never left his face as he watched her run around the playground with nobody but her self, he would laugh a quiet laugh as he listened to her talk loudly as if she was speaking with other children, he looked on in complete admiration of her personality.

Her cheeks were as red as apples, her legs covered in dirt, and as she used her hands to get her long brown hair out of her face she looked up at her grandpa and said, “Okay, I’m ready. I’m so thirsty grandpa!”

“Okay, let’s go! There is some sweet tea at the house.” Grace thought her grandpa made the best and sweetest sweet tea ever, he told her it’s because he made it with love especially for her, and she believed it.

Their two-block journey back to the house began, the only things that changed were the questions Grace came up with and some of the wild things her 5-year-old imagination would come up with.

“Grandpa did you know that when I was born I was really a puppy?” She looked up at him and began to nod her head, “It’s true, you can even ask my mom.”

He looked down at her and looked as surprised as he could and replied, “Oh really? What kind of puppy were you?” Grace paused for a moment while she thought of what to say next, at last she came up with something she thought to be fairly clever and quickly responded “Oh! I was a pink poodle and even my nails were painted!” She covered her mouth with the hand that wasn’t being held by her grandpas’ old, callused hand and giggled.

“Actually, I remember going to the hospital to see you when you were born, and you’re right! You were a pink poodle!”

“See! Told you!” They looked at each other and both burst out laughing. He loved hearing her youthful, cute laugh; it brought him reassurance and faith, and she loved making him laugh, it brought her security and made her feel loved.

Their journey was over, and they both sat at the table sipping on their sweet tea and talking. He will cherish each and every moment he will spend by her side, and she will do the same. He made her eyes shine with happiness and wonder, and she made his eyes shine with love and hope. The bond between this man and child was indescribable, the love he had for her was strong enough to move mountains, and the love she had for him was endless. They were the best of friends, and if her love could’ve saved him, her love alone would’ve made him immortal.

a letter to my first love.

a letter to you.

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The time we shared together, in love with each other was one of the best times in my life.  Thank you for supporting me, putting up with me, making me laugh, giving me confidence, encouraging me to do more, tickling my arms and back whenever i asked, accompanying me, wiping my tears away, hugging me, telling me i was beautiful, being fearless, standing up for me, telling me stupid jokes, serenading me with your guitar, taking care of me, for always being so understanding and patient, putting me in my place, breaking my heart, and many more things, but most importantly thank you for loving me.

I was young when we first fell in love, and so were you, so i understand why you did some of the things you did and quite frankly, I’m glad you did them.  It gave us some time to grow up a little, and experience different things, college for you and the end of high school for me. Although i was terribly heartbroken and felt like you left during a time when i needed you the most, there was a part of me that remained happy because i always felt our paths would cross again.  I can’t even begin to tell you how many emotions i felt when our paths finally did cross 2 years later. In a nutshell, i was nervous, scared, very happy, and a little angry.  There was so much i wanted to ask and tell you! I don’t think i ever did in fear of possibly jeopardizing our possible relationship.  I still remember how i felt when i heard your voice for the first time, i thought i had somehow missed your call because i had a voicemail from you, but nope, no missed call, but you knew a way to send just a voicemail without calling..you knew i hated talking on the phone.  My heart fell to my stomach when i opened it up and heard your voice, i don’t remember what you said, but i remember feeling so happy. The emotion only increased over time and those two months when were talking everyday i couldn’t help but fall in love with you all over again so when you left me a voicemail on 12-21-10 saying “i was going to wait until i got a job, but i just can’t wait anymore, will you be my girlfriend?” i practically had a heart attack from how happy i was. I think it was 4 days after that where i finally mustered up enough courage to ask you if it was weird that i felt like i loved you, and you quickly responded, saying nope, and i love you, too. Isn’t it crazy how those 4 words can cause such happiness in a person? & just like that..you became my first true love.

Now, our relationship wasn’t the best and we are both equally guilty of being jealous, and fighting over the dumbest things, your family was not fond of me….at all, but our relationship, while it lasted…was beautiful. I hope everybody experiences a first love like i did, i would do it all over again if i could, even if that meant it would end the same way it ended almost 3 years later.  I was so convinced i was going to spend the rest of my life with you, if someone told me otherwise i was quick to bite their head off in disagreement.  If I ended up with you like i had wanted and planned, I would’ve remained happy all the days of my life. But, that’s just not the way it was supposed to be, and I’m okay with that now. Getting over you was not easy, I didn’t know what to do with myself, in a matter of one weekend, i lost the love of my life. I’ll never forget that morning, i looked you in the eye and asked you if there was someone else, and you looked at me with your big green eyes and said there was nobody else..but of course there was and deep down i think i knew you were lying, but i didn’t let myself believe it. I didn’t want to give up on our love, and i didn’t want you to give up either, but your mind was made up. 2 months later when i thought i could see you, and talk to you like no big deal, i drove to your apartment to get something i needed, knocked on your window and out you came. Of course, one thing led to another and i ended up sitting on the couch in the living room, then we ended up at my grandmas house, i kissed your cheek, and held you.  I had never seen you cry as much as you did that day, telling me you were sorry for everything you did, how you were a shitty person for hurting me the way you did, and how you wanted to be with be again, words are just words, but I forgive you..i forgave you a long time ago, i felt like i needed to in order to heal.  I’ve started to live my life for me, I’ve been having so much fun, I’m starting to see what i really want for myself in my life, i have become my only focus, and i love myself more than i have ever loved myself.

So, in sum..thank you for every thing, even breaking my heart.  I would not be where i am now if i wasn’t for our experience with each other, having your love and then losing it. You are a great person, and i mean it. You have so much potential to do a lot with your life, and i hope you do great things with yourself, because i know you are capable of doing it.  Never stop believing in yourself, and if you ever feel like nobody believes in you, i always have and i always will, i promise you that. I hope you eventually take some time to better yourself and be alone, you need it. You need to grow alone, find out who you are without being influenced by a partner. I wish you the best, always.

The part of me that is long gone will always love you.